insomnia, nightmares and maple dip donuts

24 Apr

That’s all I got for today.  Insomnia uber exists in my life – and in the lives of others or so says their Facebook updates at 3 am.  It’s been over a week this stretch for me and last night nightmares were added during the actual light sleeping part.  Yuck.  It is the kind of nightmares where I can tell later that my brain was desperately trying to wake completely up, but couldn’t.  Instead it skidded just under consciousness.  Ugh.  Makes me not want to go to sleep at all.

The cumulative effects of the insomnia are many, that’s for sure.  The effects on my emotions are the ones I notice the most.  Not sure how to describe it other than to say it’s like I’m skidding just under hysteria.  Yuck.

Not fun.

I’d be interested to see what is going on in my brain – what areas light up and such – during the insomnia and during the nightmares.

Not helping is my unstructured life.  I had to go over to Langara College today to speak with my boss about my business writing class – just brainstorming on ways to improve it, no horror.  There is still no one signed up for May which is good because of, well, Explore.  I mean I could teach two evenings a week and do Explore for the month – it would be exhausting but I could and would.  All or nothing.  Nothing or all, that kind of thing.

I made the mistake of riding my bicycle to Langara – it was cold, raining and I was underslept and hadn’t really eaten (I find with insomnia I often don’t feel like eating). Alas, I had a maple dip donut at Langara’s Tim Horton’s.  I survived the meeting and took the skytrain part of the way home.

Sorry, I realize this is a tad dull.  Hmmm, let me liven it up.  Oh well the weather has improved and it is now a bit sunny.  So that’s exciting.

Mormons were in the less scary part of my nightmare – I was staying with some of them and then took an elevator and the elevator started racing toward the basement but I survived and then eight old or middle-aged men tried to worm their way out of the elevator responsibility.  Interesting, because all of the Mormon ‘prophets’ are middle-aged or old white men.  Funny how the subconscious works.  Take responsibility Mormon prophets for your broken and very dangerous elevator!

The rest of the nightmares were much more intense, way too intense to describe.

It may be time for another maple leaf donut.

A good night’s sleep would be so awesome and helpful.

 

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