Overchipped, definitely over-Mormoned

I should not ever buy chips larger than one of those wee small bags.  Last week at Costco with The Glenda who has the Costco card, they had a darned two pack good price thingy so I bought a huge bag of Ruffles rippled and a huge bags of taco-ey chips.  I KNOW THAT THIS IS A MISTAKE OF EPIC PROPORTIONS.  This is a mistake of large proportions.

I have no control.  Yesterday here is what I ate: toast, an egg, an apple, strawberry shortcake with both ice cream and whipped cream (at the strawberry festival at  a seniors’ manor in the West End), potato chips, chips, chips, chips, chips, chips, leftover macaroni and cheese and a $10 salad from the box.  Last evening, shockingly, I was tummy upset and had to be you know, near the washroom. No idea why really.  none at all.

I had been overchipping all week.  At one point I’d even thrown the bag in the garbage but RETRIEVED IT LATER.

So today I haven’t eaten much but that messes up my blood sugar levels.  I am now making brown rice.  I know I must never buy chips.  I am temporarily sick of chips now and kinda temporarily sick.

Despite this, I am getting my swimming mojo back.  Had a lovely swim at Kits pool this afternoon and The Glenda was there.

Did she want to go for nacho (chips) after the swim?  I asked.  We eventuallly decided not to.

I think I’m happy to have this week off in between Explore programs.  I don’t go back until July 3rd.  I get EI for this week so while that is very little, that is still nice.  Then back for 8 weeks of work and then as I say, nadda, nothing and nyet.  Getting my savings ready to go and go and go.

Overchipped.  Way overchipped.

Also, the Mormon thing.  I am now having back and forth commenting on a Mormon blog. The thing is, Mormons seem so so nice and I think they are mainly because they don’t delve too deeply into what Joseph Smith really said and did and what their modern day prophets say and do.

I readily admit to having a form of OCD (not the obsessive cleaning one sadly) and also to being a contrarian.  It’s bizarre how absolutely obsessed I’ve become with expressing my opinions on this blog, even though I know no Mormon shall be unMormoned due to anything I say or do or think or write.  And still I keep going back.  I think my brain needs more intellectual stimulation really.

The weather is going to be nice tomorrow apparently so that will be good.  I’m actually going to go to my writers’ group tomorrow evening!  It’s at the Glenda’s and she’s making up some veggie burgers.  Thank you, The Glenda.

I need to widen my social circle, not really sure at all how to do that but I do know that becoming a Mormon is not so much the way to go, ha. Next up: infiltrating Scientology.

Oh and back to the Explore students – darned if thy didn’t make and give me a giant card that most signed except for the student who was so mad at me because he got zero on the presentation he chose to skip.  I was shocked by the card actually.  The students just seemed bored and vaguely ticked off all session but now I realize that most of that had nothing to do with me, something that boss M. had been telling me.  Now I know and next session should be much easier, me thinks.  Three of the teachers are either vacationing or going to ELI (I NEED A MASTERS OR TO BE WORKING ON A MASTERS TO BE DOING ANYTHING OTHER THAN THE SUMMER SHORT PROGRAMS) so we will be getting three fresh off the interview new teachers.  I think it’s not easy finding folks who will work for just 5 weeks.  Hopefully they will fit in as well as the others did.  I trust that M. will pick some good ones.  I trust him and I like his form of being a boss which is nice actually.

The last Sister Wives for the season is on now!  Oh yikes Meri is crying yet again.

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Hard to stop

Because it is how my brain works (or dysfunctions, let’s be honest).  Deep grooves in my brain that I can’t just talk my way out of.  Ended that sentence with a preposition.

The corporation keeps making mistakes with the T4 – an amended one, then the wrong one sent out to me again and still Revenue Canada has received not a thing.

Don’t you know, I can’t help e-mailing the Vancouver guy, that your company is incurring fines daily.  I returned tonight to an e-mail from a Eunice in Toronto who assures me in broken English that they are now sending out my amended T4.   She hopes it is correct, she says.  Have a good day, she says.  I think Eunice is new, brought in at the eleventh hour.

My mind is so on this – on the absurdity of it all and the circus that is has become.  The corporation has apparently sent out T4s stating that some employees who didn’t even work there in 2011 made $16,000 in 2011.  My mind gobbles all of this up. 

But it’s not good for me – I need to focus on more positive things because all of my free floating anger is going toward the corporation and it doesn’t damage them, just me.  All of my righteous anger, my scoffing. 

This is how my brain works.  These are the grooves and the beats it knows.  Sometimes it just gets stuck in the mud, spinning its wheels.  I have some friends who understand this because their minds get stuck as well – differently but they understand.

“Get a subtotal,” I repeated, vaguely obsessively to my pal Tracy when we were at Costco.  She’s gotten in trouble for letting other people use her card so she has to pretend all the items are hers and then I pay her back.  Silly, it seems to me but she seems genuinely afraid.

“Get a subtotal.”

She looked at me, dead serious.

“Stop talking.”

“That’s a bit rude,” I said.

“Stop talking,” she repeated.

After, while she ate a hotdog, she explained again how the Costco people have warned her.

“One more time and I’m out,” she said.

The rhythm of my mind – to push the music analogy too far, had a chorus of ‘get a subtotal.’  It drives me nuts when other people do this because I know it is rooted in anxiety.

“It’s like I was touretty,” I say to pal Glenda later.

“More  OCDee,” she said.

I am so lucky to have people who get me.

My T4 obsession will resolve but it will take longer to clear the corporation from my mind.  Working on it.

Speaking of work, I have two weeks left!  Only!  Eeek.  Best job ever really.  Went to the Lonsdale Quay with the students on Friday.  Too bad it was raining as the seabus ride wasn’t as glorious as it can well be.  But I think they liked it.  Waaaaaay better than the too difficult Reiki talk from earlier in the week.  Next week we’re going on a Save-On Foods (on campus) guided nutrition tour and next Friday, bowling.  They perked up at the idea of bowling.  Five pin.  Groovy.

And yes, wee, fan base, my typos will continue.  Oddly, I’m not obsessive about not having them.  And that’s okay.

Move the clocks forward one hour tonight folks.  The spring is a-coming.